


We Don't Talk About the 80's (But the Year Before is a Sore Spot Too)

by memelessness



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Alternate Universe-Role Reversal, Angel!Crowley(Corviel), Demon!Aziraphale(Ziraphon), Ineffable Husbands(Good Omens), Other, Reverse Omens, Roleswap AU, alternate universe-cannon divergence, reverse au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-24
Updated: 2019-08-24
Packaged: 2020-09-25 22:28:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20379145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/memelessness/pseuds/memelessness
Summary: The one where Ziraphon knew about Corviel's fling with Freddie Mercury before the angel finally admitted it.





	We Don't Talk About the 80's (But the Year Before is a Sore Spot Too)

**Author's Note:**

> This was mostly a vent fic, so a lot doesn't make sense out of context I don't think
> 
> But the angel slept with Freddie Mercury which prompted an Argument where they didn't see each other throughout the 1980's

“Oh, that’s new.” Ziraphon pointed over to the two Queen albums set on display, both signed by Freddie Mercury. Today he wore bell-bottoms to the right length (worn a little tighter to his hips because it would just look strange to shorten the legs) and a top that showed his midriff. He’d been trying out a navel piercing, but he wasn’t exactly sure if it suited him… oh well, he could tear it out when it gets old.

Corviel approached the demon with a quiet hum, hands placed firmly on his hips, “Oh yeah, that’s a recent addition!” Somehow there was pride,  _ actual pride _ , in the angel’s words.

This confused Ziraphon for a moment. Why was his angel so proud? The love of his life that he was so sure hadn’t felt the same for him… or anyone in that regard. They were an angel! Angels don’t feel love outside of the regular ‘they’re all God’s creatures.’ So why was Corviel, a beautiful angel, an absolute prude, and a  _ virgin  _ acting so proudly about these albums as if he’d  _ slept _ with-

“Corviel. How did you get these?” The blond asked skeptically, sipping at his drink. He was scared to hear the answer, but he just had to know.

“O-oh… well, you see…” Corviel tried to search through his words, fingers tapping frantically against his thigh (he only did that when he was nervous, and Ziraphon knew that), “Freddie was hosting a party last week, and I might’ve stayed a bit too long. We spent the night… talking and he signed those for me.” 

That  _ fucking _ prude!

Ziraphon opened his mouth to speak, quickly closing it. He couldn’t find the words. For the first time in his nearly 6000 years of existence, he could not find a single word for a single joke to make light of the conversation! How could he? When the being he was so desperately in love with has indirectly admitted to  _ sleeping _ with Freddie FUCKING Mercury?!

He didn’t know what to say… so instead he decided to leave.

“Aziraphon, where are you-”

“I forgot to check my succulents this morning.” He raised a hand dismissively, not turning his head to face his… er well… the angel. He couldn’t look Corviel in the eye, not after that, “My babies need me. You know how it is.” And he stepped out of the store and got in his car.

A Ford Model A, shipped from America upon its invention. It was one of the many things that Ziraphon took great pride in. He’d kept it in pristine condition for fifty years now. She was an amusing car and had a thing for shoes.

As he sped off, he didn’t care that he was crying. He just didn’t want _Corviel_ to follow him. To ask the many questions he’d already known were swirling in their mind. He didn’t care! They can dig themselves into an existential hole for betraying him like this!... but he didn’t really think that… He could never blame Corviel, his beloved angel, for the things they do. Maybe they were just lonely? Or worse… what if they fell in love? With a human?... But why couldn’t they love him the same way? Why did this have to hurt so _damn_ **_much_**!

And it was hypocritical for Ziraphon to be oh so suddenly miserable about this. He’d slept with far many more people over the span of millennia, it was his job! But for Corviel to… After so many years, from enemies to acquaintances, work associates, friends...  _ Best _ friends…Those few and sparse nights of utter intoxication where he'd barely get a kiss... He thought he actually stood a chance. Did all that not matter, anymore? 

He’d made it to his apartment in no time, staring hollowly out the window for far too long before making the decision to move. He hated this. He  _ hated _ the pit he felt in his stomach as he trudged up the stairs, looking broken, and sad, and defeated all the way until he shut the door to his home.

The demon strolled across his flat, looking over every single succulent with proper care. Then his eyes fell to a shaking aloe, and he took his glasses off.

“What’s wrong, Darling.” He spoke softly as he approached, noticing how it had hidden its leaves. His pride and joy, hiding from a shame their too scared to disclose. He reached out to gently caress the leaf, noticing how it fractured and the insides began to ooze from the irreparable wound.

“Oh… I see how it is…” Ziraphon’s words were cracked and broken as he stood back up, picking up the pot on his way, “I see now. I give you love, and a home, and a sunny windowsill for you to stay… and this is how you repay me?!” He opened the window, looking down at his plant in miserable sorrow, “I gave you _ everything!  _ I MADE YOU A PART OF ME, AND THIS IS THE THANKS I GET?!”

The poor, young aloe was shivering, terrified of what was to come.

“Get out… Get out! GET OUT OF MY HOME!” He threw the plant out the window, harder than any plant before, “I GAVE YOU ALL MY LOVE AND TRUST FOR  _ THIS?! _ I SACRIFICED MYSELF FOR YOU, OVER, AND OVER, AND OVER AGAIN!!! FIVE THOUSAND YEARS, CORV-” He stopped himself, watching the ceramic pot impact against the road and shattering into many pieces… Maybe his anger wasn’t completely because his beloved succulent decided to betray him… 

Ziraphon closed the window, letting out a shaky sigh as he trudged to the bedroom. He needed to sleep this off… and he wouldn’t be over it in one day. He needed a break… maybe he would consider returning to the music store next week...

Months later, without any warning, The Argument happened. A voice rising in anger, a hand raising in violence. Hurt words, glares, yelling, proclamations of hatred exchanged. 

All he had to blame was himself… and Freddie fucking Mercury…

**Author's Note:**

> Please support all our works on [Our Collection](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/CorvielZiraphon)


End file.
